WRITING TASK 2

You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

Write about the following topic：

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Write at least 250 words.

题目分析

题目中有两个观点：有的人认为在科学研究、商业、学术领域，尽可能地分享信息是很好的一件事，但是其他人认为有的信息太宝贵以至于不能免费分享。文章的结构可以整理成为四段式，开头段直接点明自己的观点是什么。主体段第一段可以写人们支持在科学研究、商业、学术领域尽可能分享信息，给出一些理由：信息共享可以更大程度上节约时间，促进科学研究、商业、学术的快速发展。主体段第二段写部分宝贵信息不能免费分享，可以给一些理由：涉及国家机密或者商业机密时，所分享的信息就应该是有限的。可以从这些方面去对题目的两个观点进行延展和分析，要充分展开和论证。最后，在结尾段进行总结和重申自己的观点。

范文

Sharing information is actual issue in our world where it has strong influence on people.There are various spheres of our life where information is more or less important for people working there on out of this.For this reason some people consider that it is good to share information while others think in opposite way.

For example，practically all scientists are glad to share information with ordinary people or other scientists.There is no competition in this sphere.Sometimes it is bad for govenment which scientist share the secret information with international spy but it will not hurtinformation.

There are some sample rules in academic world which informational sources between people.If person is interested in theme discussing with you and you are ready to keep talking then the person gives you all information what he knows for free.On the other hand，if the person knows much and he knows that you cannot give him actual or new information then he will share information with you just for money.For example，student pay for his learning while two students can cooperate and share information with each other.It is obviously that sharing information in business world can follows by release.There is large competition and it may takes much costs for companies.Companies loose their profit every day because some one cannot keep silence especially IT companies.

To sum up，all above it is necessary to say that there are some spheres in which sharing information is a crime.In my opinion，in many cases information can be important to sharing at all.

 

考官评语

这篇文章的考生取得了6.0分。下面是考官的评语：

尽管考生对 “shared freely”有一些误解，考生的作文也解决了题目所有的问题；基本上考生提出来的观点是题目中提到的，但是没有很多扩展，特别是对于题目中提到的 “business world”。文章有清晰的整体的结构，并且考生的观点也在最后呈现出来，但是在使用连接词过程中出现了错误，比如，working there on out of this/which scientist。词汇也算是刚符合标准的情况，尽管一些用词有错，比如 actual；文章中存在单词拼写错误，比如theme，loose 等。句式多样，包含了简单句和复合句，语法方面的错误也没有影响整理的理解。

范文分析

【写作任务回应情况Task Response】

整篇文章围绕题目所讨论的点进行展开和讨论，并且也涵盖了题目中所有的方面，包括scientific research，business，academic world。针对这三个方面进行分开描述，文章结构算是比较清晰，主要论点有相关性，但是一些方面的论据不够充分。比如，在讲到scientific research 的时候，里面还可以增加一些论据，包括列举一些科学家交流峰会或者学术研讨会的例子，这些都可以作为论据去支持论点，这样可以达到充分论证和扩展段落的目的。

【连贯与衔接Coherence and Cohesion】

总体说来能够清晰地推进行文发展，也有效使用了衔接手段，文章中有明显的逻辑连接词，比如on the other hand；句子之间的衔接也很自然，比如while，for example 的使用。例如：On the other hand，if the person knows much and he knows that you cannot give him actual or new information then he will share information with you just for money.For example，student pay for his learning while two students can cooperate and share information with each other.文章也有分段，但可能缺乏逻辑性。

【词汇丰富程度Lexical Resource】

文章中使用了适当范围的词汇，试图使用不常见词汇，但是词汇使用有存在错误，比如“actual issue”“information...release”，但是这些错误不影响交流。文章中存在单词的拼写错误，比如，government 写成了 govenment，lose 写成了loose，这些都是考生们常犯的错误。文章也存在用词不准确的问题，比如“keep silence”应该改为 “keep silent”，keep后面跟形容词。

【语法多样性及准确性Grammatical Range and Accuracy】

文章综合使用简单句和复合句，包括了条件状语从句、并列句。文章当中也存在一定的语法错误，尽管这些错误不影响交流，如“can followes/may takes”。can/may/must 后面都是直接接动词原形，这些地方都是考生们容易犯错的地方。

补充词汇