EMPOWERMENT WITH SELF

4

Resolving Chronic
Health Problems

A bodily disease which we look upon
as whole and entire within itself,
may, after all, be but a symptom
of some ailment in the spiritual part.

NATHANIEL HAWTHORNE

* Helen: Here I was, a top administrator in a large city public library system, and the stress of it was killing me. I was working a zillion hours, and it was all administrative—I wasn’t working with children or books, both of which I loved. I knew I had to leave, but it’s really hard to leave a job that you create. Anyway, I did it, I left, but then I needed another job quick. So I took a position that focused on teaching librarians how to use the Internet. I worked on computers all day, every day, and let me tell you, computers aren’t my thing. It was all-encompassing, and I hated the computer aspect. I then began to have these terrible dizzy spells—blinding spells that made me nauseous and weak, and I couldn’t see. It was so painful to use my eyes in any way, to read the computer screen, to read books. I felt dizzy and sick all the time. Imagine a librarian not being able to read books, books that I had so loved. I went to doctor after doctor, and nobody could get to the bottom of it. I grew allergic to my contacts, and I couldn’t wear my glasses either. Nothing was working. I had so much stress, just dealing with feeling sick all the time and trying to hold it together for my little children. On top of that, I was dealing with my mother’s decline into dementia with Alzheimer’s, and the sudden death of my cousin from cancer. It just was all too much. But I always had a gut feeling that my dizziness was about being on the wrong path, doing the wrong work.

Helen is describing her debilitating eye disorder that, despite her long and hard efforts to find effective treatment or a cure, would not be alleviated until she relieved the stress she was bearing from her job. This experience is all too common among professional women—suffering from physical ailments that recur and break the body down over time. Traditional medical approaches often are limited in their capability to successfully treat these illnesses. Only when individuals remove the stress, helplessness, and frustration of their current paths do they find themselves on the road back to health.

Clearly, a very strong mind-body-spirit connection exists. Many people resist this concept, but to me such resistance is a denial of what is simply right in front of us—a far more expansive view of what our human physicality means and represents. My wakeup call on this front occurred when I experienced severe and recurring tracheitis that would not be cured. For four years I was plagued with recurrent pain, loss of voice, throat infection, fever, and exhaustion. Doctors couldn’t figure out why I kept having these troubles and just gave me antibiotics, which created more health problems. So, at my wit’s end, I consulted an energy healer a friend had recommended.

This energy healer said, “Kathy, this pain and illness in your throat is like a ‘crying within,’ a sign that you are not being true to yourself, or speaking truth for yourself. What kind of work do you do?” As I described my work and how miserable I was, the healer continued, “You see, this work, this job, doesn’t reflect the real you at all—it’s a farce, a sham for you. Your illness is a message, communicated over and over, that you are using the seat of your expression—your voice—in ways that are contrary to who you really are. You need to find a way to be more true to yourself, to express yourself honestly and openly. What’s going on at work? Are you being mistreated? Are they doing things you don’t agree with there?” Of course, the answer was YES! on all fronts. She concluded, “I think you need a new job or profession, and you shouldn’t wait.”

The healer saw what I couldn’t—the professional road I’d taken for years was a false and demeaning one. But I was too “stuck” to face it. I couldn’t speak up for myself. Nor was I speaking up to myself about how much I disliked my work and the lack of meaning in it. Illness brought me to the realization that I couldn’t wait any longer to make a change—now was the time.

How do we overcome chronic illness? One potent way is to understand what your illness is saying to you. For me, I realized that my throat problem was telling me to speak up for myself. So I began to. I decided to tell the truth as best I could, whenever I could, and be honest with myself and others. I admitted out loud when things weren’t working. This one act was extremely challenging for me, but I knew it was essential to live a happy, healthy life. I promised too that I would never go back to doing work merely to make money, a soulless effort with no meaningful benefit.

Helen also realized that her physical disability was related to her being on the wrong professional path. She saw too that she was overwhelmed with stress. She needed to step off this track and fast.

After several years of this sickness and hitting rock-bottom, I was finally connected with a great behavioral optometrist who diagnosed me as having a binocular disorder, and I got some relief through eye exercises and medication. As I felt a bit better, I realized too that I had to leave this computer job. Once I committed to needing to leave, and to slow down, I found a wonderful part-time job at my son’s private school as the school librarian. It’s fun, relaxing, stress-free, and I’m working with children and books, and I’m beloved by my colleagues. I just love it. I’m doing what I enjoy, and my eyes and dizziness are so much better. I’ve let go of the stress, and I’m much happier now.

What great advice Helen gives. Letting go of stress and saying YES! to following your intuition and heart can work miracles. The amazing news for me regarding my health is that I have been tracheitis-free since the day I walked out the door of my last corporate job and chose a new path. No need for antibiotics, no frequent trips to the doctor—the illness is gone, as is the cause of the stress I experienced. I am no longer stuck on a path that is in opposition to who I am. I couldn’t agree more with Helen about the importance of letting go of stress. Moving away from work that is wrong for you can save your health and your life.

Hear Your Body

Our bodies communicate, always. From the smallest ailments to the larger forms of malaise or disease, we’re receiving continual, vital information from our bodies about the condition of our minds, emotions, and spirits. There are many approaches to understanding the information our bodies share. Vast numbers of helpful resources and tools are available to learn how to decipher our physical messages. From studying the chakra system and energy healing techniques such as reiki to exploring acupuncture, crystal healing, tai chi, meditation, or energy medicine as a whole, we can choose to embark on a lifelong journey of understanding the knowledge our body expresses. Tapping into our body’s wisdom, we uncover new ways to heal.

No single approach is best; the key is to find the approach that works for you. For me, studying reiki was instrumental in connecting me with the universal life force energy and flow. Experiencing energy flow in myself and others, and being able to sense energy gaps and stoppages, has been transformational. For others, meditation and learning to be in silent communication with themselves is life-changing. For others still, simply going inward and asking “What is my body telling me?” is helpful.

Whatever your chosen approach, the first step is to accept that your body is indeed communicating. Listening and taking heed is necessary to achieve full health and well-being. By opening our minds to the possibility that our emotional and spiritual blocks contribute to our malaise and disease, we can unlock our potential. We release ourselves from the many mind-forged manacles that keep us chained to our limitations, physical and otherwise.

One easy way to begin to understand your body’s messages is to look at your current ailment for a possible metaphoric meaning. What might this ailment be showing you, literally? For instance, if you’re having eye problems, as Helen did, what might you need to “see” more clearly about your current situation? In Helen’s case, her eyes were literally and figuratively revealing that using her eyes for computer work was not working for her. On a literal level, a librarian must use her eyes for her work, yet Helen was experiencing dizziness and nausea when she used them. Message: Time to consider stopping this job or this type of work. On a metaphoric level, eye problems can mean “What are you not seeing clearly?” Message: You need to see how the stress and joylessness of this work are hurting you.

Exploring your ailment for what it means metaphorically can be quite helpful in revealing where you need to make key changes. I am certainly not suggesting that you abandon traditional medical approaches. On the contrary, I recommend that you explore a range of approaches that feel right to you in addressing your issue. One of those worthwhile approaches involves expanding your view of what your ailment could be telling you, then taking action to address it.

Some examples of possible underlying meanings behind illness follow.

A helpful approach to understanding the meaning of your physical ailments is to ask your intuitive self, your higher self, to advise you about what this illness could be expressing about your life. When you get into the habit of consulting this dimension of yourself, the information you receive becomes clearer, more directed and pointed each time. It shows you how to adjust your life now to alleviate the stress and strain on your body, mind, and spirit.

I have found an extremely beneficial resource in my life and work—Louise Hay’s You Can Heal Your Life. In this groundbreaking book, Ms. Hay describes many major ailments or diseases that we commonly experience today and reveals a key underlying problem that is potentially at the core of each disease. Use outside tools and resources (including this one) only if the information feels true for you and compels you to explore it further.

Understanding that your body is a physical expression of the larger you—your spirit, your life energy, your vibration, your thoughts and emotions—will help you gain a broader perspective and deeper wisdom about what holds you back. You’ll see clearly what contributes to your dis-ease.

Heed Your Intuition

While our bodies regularly communicate essential information, our intuition is attempting to make itself heard as well. But what it says often falls on deaf ears. Our intuition—the inner wisdom that provides direction and guidance—is a vital part of who we are, yet we often completely disregard it. Western society doesn’t yet honor intuition as a source of reliable information, but other, older and wiser cultures do. They revere intuition as a way to connect with the “all that is”—the spiritual, divine, creative force within each of us that binds us to each other and to the universe as a whole. Heeding your intuition will help keep you on a path that is true for you, a path that will prove to be the most fulfilling and satisfying.

The best way I know of to begin hearing your inner voice is to develop a keen awareness of the dialogue that occurs within you. Start by becoming aware of your inner thoughts, and of any physical sensations that accompany these thoughts. Practicing awareness of your intuitive voice helps you access your own, best guidance, which has your true interests at heart.

The second step is to find regular times to calm your body and still your mind. This practice can be done through meditation, deep breathing, yoga, exercise, gardening, painting—any activity that focuses your attention and quiets the chatter of your mind. In this way, you “drop down” to a deeper place in your body, where intuition can be accessed more easily. Your intuition and inner voice is your guide to identifying and moving toward what you truly long to be in this lifetime. Various guided-meditation CDs (I highly recommend Shakti Gawain’s Creative Visualization Meditations) and books, including Developing Intuition by Shakti Gawain, can help you on this path.

If you don’t heed your intuition, you’re rudderless. Life will unfold as it will, but you will suffer more than you need to without your inner guidance. By using your intuition and inner wisdom to direct you, your life will proceed more smoothly, positively, and constructively. Heeding your intuition helps you stay “in the flow” of who you naturally are.

Another way of getting in touch with your intuition is to continually ask yourself questions and listen to the answers. Begin to foster an ongoing inner dialogue with yourself, and use your inner experience as your highest authority. Get used to accessing and integrating your gut instinct in all you do. Honor and abide by your hunches. You will be amazed at what opens up for you, and what suffering you’ll avoid when you do. Start by asking your higher self “yes” or “no” questions at first, and follow the guidance you receive. Then, little by little, go inside, ask for guidance, and use this wisdom as your highest authority for everything you do.

Follow Your Heart

What keeps us from doing what we want to, long to, need to, in order to be happy and thrive? Each of us needs to ask ourselves this pivotal question every day, every week, every year: What holds me back from following my heart?

If we examine the answers people most commonly give to this question, the responses fall into several categories. Fear is the first and biggest deterrent to following our hearts. “What if I fail and make a fool of myself?” people say. “Won’t they think I’m selfish and egotistical to follow these dreams?” is another common question. And another major fear: “Will I be harmed or become more vulnerable if I follow my heart?”

We’re afraid of following our hearts because doing so might bring us to a place where we’ll:

• Leave others behind

• Make others jealous, angry, or resentful of us

• Appear greater than someone else

• Be forced to face our own uniqueness

• Have to move out of our comfort zones

• Be led to make a huge leap of faith

• Become more vulnerable to scrutiny and criticism

• See that we are truly capable of achieving our dreams, which can feel overwhelming

So what’s so scary about achieving our dreams? What intimidates many of us is that if we are really capable of achieving our dreams, then nothing is holding us back but ourselves, and that idea overwhelms many people. A friend of mine said: “You mean, this is all in my hands? I think I’d rather stay comforted in the idea that there are things outside of my control that are holding me back.”

No, it’s not all in our hands. But one thing surely is—the ability and need to follow our hearts. We were given these longings for the experience of following them, not denying that they exist or thinking that we have to revise them. When we ignore the longings of our hearts, sickness often comes.

The second biggest reason we don’t follow our hearts is that we are told not to. In our society, we focus almost exclusively on external barometers of health, happiness, and success. We disregard or degrade the inner criteria that our hearts yearn to use to define success and joy, such as feeling valued, loved, peaceful, nurturing, stress-free, worthwhile, and of service. You can’t see or hold these by-products of a successful life, but to many, they are the most precious. Most often we are told not to follow our hearts by people who have failed to do so. Following your heart requires stretching. It takes you out of your comfort zone and demands courage, fortitude, and faith. But those who do follow their hearts are the most expansive, inspiring, and exciting people you will ever meet.

Hundreds of people have told me that they have been advised by loved ones, friends, and colleagues to “do the safe thing,” “stop living pipe dreams,” and “grow up and face facts.” Such misguided advice tells you to live less than who you are.

MOVING FORWARD TO BREAKTHROUGH

* STEP BACK

Since you have chosen to read this book, you are probably undergoing a significant change in your work and life—one that is challenging, exciting, and frightening. Or perhaps you are longing to make a dramatic change and seek support and guidance to make it.

Take this opportunity to open your mind and your heart. Allow in a new perspective, a keener ability to connect with your higher level of information and insight. Embrace a broader, more positive interpretation about the situation you’re experiencing.

This step, of allowing in a deeper understanding of what is, requires:

• Believing in the possibility that this life situation has been co-created by you for your own happiness and expansion

• Being willing to see new interpretations of old, negative patterns that are longing to be released

• Embracing the idea that your moving forward now, while perhaps discomforting, will be rewarding and enriching

Think about the situation that is causing you the most distress in your life at this time. In your journal, capture all your thoughts. No censoring, please—write everything that comes to mind.

• What exactly is causing you pain?

• What and who does it involve? (Family, children, professional life, moving, loss of a loved one or of a role you have played, a new role or function, a conflict, a failure, etc.)

• Flesh out as fully as possible all aspects and dimensions of this situation or transition.

• What are you telling yourself about your competence, worthiness, and abilities when you think about this situation? How are you beating yourself up?

• What are you most afraid of, or worried or concerned about?

* LET GO of ignoring or resisting what is.

• What are you resisting that your heart says it wants?

• What are you ignoring that won’t go away?

• What potential options are you rejecting that may be partly acceptable to you, but you’ve “thrown them out with the bathwater”?

Once you become clear about what you are ignoring and resisting, take this step: Embrace what you are resisting. If it’s that you hate your work, embrace that reality. If it’s that you’re ill all the time, face that reality. If it’s that you can’t take the stress of your life anymore, see that—and commit to doing one small thing about it, this week.

What I will no longer ignore is: ____________________________________________

The step I will take to face what I’m resisting and get help to address it is: __________

______________________________________________________________________

* SAY YES! to hearing the messages of your body, your intuition, and your heart.

Recommended Steps

1. Take several down-to-your-stomach, diaphragmatic breaths. (For a wonderful guide to deep and meditative breathing, check out Three Deep Breaths, by Thomas Crum.)

2. Bring to mind the physical ailment you’re suffering from. Fully feel it in your body and think of its impact on your life.

3. Now quietly go inward and ask yourself—consult your inner guidance, your intuition—to tell you everything about this ailment.

　• What does my ailment really represent?

　• What must I say yes! to for this ailment to be healed?

　• What does my heart tell me to do right now?

4. Ask yourself, “What one step can I take this month to honor my intuitive voice, follow my heart, and heal this ailment?” Write down the answer, and commit to taking this one small step this month.

5. Write in your journal what you experience as you Let Go of what you are resisting, and Say Yes! to your body, intuition, and heart.

Remember

You are meant to listen to your body, follow your heart, and heed your intuition, not deny them. You will heal.

Helen reminds us

“See yourself two years from now, and imagine what your life can be. Don’t give up on yourself; keep focusing on what you need to do to feel better. You will get through this.”

* BREAKTHROUGH “I am healthy and strong.”