How to Get Outrageous Results from This Book

Define “Outrageous”

According to Merriam-Webster, “outrageous” means “Exceeding the limits of what is usual … Not conventional or matter-of-fact: fantastic.”

For the purposes of this book, “ask outrageously” is defined as making a request outside your comfort zone. There is a difference between outrageous and obnoxious. Nowhere will you see a suggestion to be negative or deceitful, or to take advantage of others. Instead, people who ask outrageously are surprised by the positive outcomes and relationships that result from requesting more than usual.

Where did this idea begin?

Years ago, a client asked me to work with a group of highlevel sales professionals. He was frustrated with several poor performers who argued, made excuses, and refused to ask clients to consider the company’s new product. Fed up, my client and I decided to create an “asking” contest. We added an extra hour to their lunch, split them into small groups, gave each group $20, and sent them to an upscale mall next to the resort. Their challenge was simple: “Go ask for more and report your results to the group.”

When the teams displayed their results, the difference was shocking. One group opted out and went to a bar. Another group added $10 of its own money and took advantage of a cosmetics promotion. One group purchased a buy-one-get-one-free offer for a dinner and increased their amount to $40. The last two groups returned with items totaling well over $100. By asking for samples, discounts, and freebies, they creatively out-requested their peers. (Guess which two groups had the better sales professionals and were highly successful with the new product that year.)

The challenge has been refined. Although many of the reported results are small, some are remarkable. Under a short deadline with few guidelines other than “go ask and report your results,” attendees at all levels in a variety of professions achieved outrageous outcomes. For example, they:

Asked for and were granted raises and promotions.

Asked and repaired or elevated personal relationships.

Asked and created a new business or established new lines of business.

Asked for and received goods and services they could not otherwise afford.

Asked for and recovered debt or reduced business expenses.

Asked for and were given real estate property, including a house and a building.

With additional training, tools, and coaching, people continued to ask and received outcomes that surpassed anyone’s expectations. Most of them credited their successes to new insights about communicating powerfully and being challenged to ask outrageously.

If You Have No Difficulties Asking, Do You Need This Book?

You may be among the 20 percent who say that they are already very good at asking and get what they want most of the time. Perhaps you are thinking something like the following:

“I already know how to ask for what I want and I usually get it.”

“Really? People don’t ask for things? What’s their problem?”

“What’s the bottom line? I have work to get done.”

You know how to identify and approach those with authority. And when it comes to asking, you have no fear. At times, you push the envelope with your requests. You may even treat asking as a challenge or game. You get great results and have a proven track record. If you have no difficulties asking, here are a few reasons to continue reading:

You lead others. You can’t determine why your people won’t simply ask for a sale, close a deal, ask for a discount, or fix an ongoing problem.

Someone you care about won’t address a conflict, talk to a leader, ask for a raise, solve an issue, or get what they deserve.

You received feedback that people don’t always relate to, connect with, or trust you. Perhaps you’ve heard you are too tough on others, or you’ve received feedback about improving collaboration, growing your people, or forming better internal or external relationships.

Agreements you thought were made and understood aren’t. You can’t let down your guard. You need to monitor details and watch people to make sure they uphold their commitments and promises.

You know others could be more forthcoming, creative, or helpful. Yet you feel as if you are making all the effort with people who aren’t supportive and don’t care as much as you do.

Lead Others to Ask sections are found at the end of every chapter immediately before the Outrageous Reviews. Leaders may want to see the Outrageous Reviews at the end of each chapter as an executive summary complete with tools to help you implement.

After reading this book, you will be better prepared to determine when and what to ask. You will be exposed to the best ways to request what you want at work and in life with confidence and integrity. This book provides steps to reach breakthrough results and ask for more than you believe possible.

What’s in the book?

This book provides proven principles and ideas to help you show up powerfully and ask outrageously. These strategies and recommendations are supported by my more than twenty-five years’ experience making high-stakes requests and helping people. Included are secrets and insights to help you understand the “why” behind some people’s actions.

Each chapter offers engaging questions and actionable tips to help you get started. Instead of theories or philosophical ideas, you’ll learn specific techniques and find tools to help you remember what to do under pressure. There are checklists to assist you in preparing and suggested conversations with scripted language to help you ask with confidence and in a way that makes people listen.

Scenarios. In the pages that follow, you’ll find reports of the asking challenge, client stories, and other short, real-world examples of people who asked for and received more than they thought they deserved. In some cases, the names or details have been changed to protect the innocent (and the guilty), but the facts and outcomes are real and repeatable.

Ask Outrageously Study. Throughout this book, you’ll see references to a study on how people ask and what holds them back. That study, conducted electronically over a four-month period, was designed to collect information about how people make requests. Respondents were given the option to take the survey anonymously. Their answers were insightful and reflected the difficulty most people have in making requests. Participants reported no significant differences in making personal and professional requests. Many provided encouragement to others to ask more powerfully and to receive better results.

The 1,163 survey participants came from professions within twenty-one occupational categories in a wide variety of industries (see Figure 1). The most common professional fields participating in the research were sales, marketing, and public relations—fields in which practitioners earn a living making requests.

The survey contained a mix of open-ended and multiple choice (single- and multiple-select) questions with an ability to provide optional comments. Survey responses are presented throughout the book in the form of graphs, respondent quotes, descriptions, suggestions, and experiences woven into scenarios. Unless otherwise designated, mentions of research, study findings, and survey participants refer to the Ask Outrageously Study. Full results are available at AskOutrageously.com.

Quotes. Unless otherwise indicated, italicized text indicates quotes provided by participants in the Ask Outrageously Study as well as feedback from our program participants, audience members, and clients.

Outrageous Review. At the end of each chapter, you’ll find an executive summary with highlights of the chapter. You can read the entire book and look at the summaries later as reference. If you prefer, skim through the book using the reviews and explore just the sections that interest you now.

Smart Asks. At the end of the chapters you’ll find questions to help you ask with more confidence and have fewer regrets.

Ask List. Task lists are so last decade. Instead, add these outrageous asks to your to-do list. All of these requests are safe and proven to upgrade your results. When you practice asking outside your comfort zone, you prove to yourself that you can be more successful by asking outrageously. Accept these challenges to become a master of requests.

Secret Success Tools. In addition, you have access to supporting resources on the website AskOutrageously.com. Use these tips, materials, and tools to dramatically improve your requests.

Lead Others to Ask. A twist on the often-recommended “Ask to Lead,” this section contains suggestions for developing the people you supervise, mentor, or coach to ask more powerfully. These techniques help you delegate request making. They are designed to address the question “I’m great at making requests. How do I coach others to ask and get the results I do?”

Take the Assessment. Before reading further, please take the free assessment How Well Do You Ask? on page 18. You can also take the assessment online at AskOutrageously.com. The online version will direct you to additional tools.

If you think you already ask outrageously, the results will either confirm or challenge your perception. Now, are you ready for an outrageous request, or if you prefer, a dare? See if you are as good at asking as you think you are. Take the assessment. The results may surprise you.

Using proven strategies, you can dramatically improve your ability to be heard, to be seriously considered, and to influence powerfully.

Are you ready to be a smart ask and maximize your results? Great! Read on to ask outrageously!