第29章

"Oh, your theories about life, your theories about love, your theories about pleasure.All your theories, in fact, Harry.""Pleasure is the only thing worth having a theory about," he answered in his slow melodious voice."But I am afraid I cannot claim my theory as my own.It belongs to Nature, not to me.Pleasure is Nature's test, her sign of approval.When we are happy, we are always good, but when we are good, we are not always happy.""Ah! but what do you mean by good?" cried Basil Hallward.

"Yes," echoed Dorian, leaning back in his chair and looking at Lord Henry over the heavy clusters of purple-lipped irises that stood in the centre of the table, "what do you mean by good, Harry?""To be good is to be in harmony with one's self," he replied, touching the thin stem of his glass with his pale, fine-pointed fingers.

"Discord is to be forced to be in harmony with others.One's own life--that is the important thing.As for the lives of one's neighbours, if one wishes to be a prig or a Puritan, one can flaunt one's moral views about them, but they are not one's concern.Besides, individualism has really the higher aim.Modern morality consists in accepting the standard of one's age.Iconsider that for any man of culture to accept the standard of his age is a form of the grossest immorality.""But, surely, if one lives merely for one's self, Harry, one pays a terrible price for doing so?" suggested the painter.

"Yes, we are overcharged for everything nowadays.I should fancy that the real tragedy of the poor is that they can afford nothing but self-denial.

Beautiful sins, like beautiful things, are the privilege of the rich.""One has to pay in other ways but money.""What sort of ways, Basil?"

"Oh! I should fancy in remorse, in suffering, in...well, in the consciousness of degradation."Lord Henry shrugged his shoulders."My dear fellow, mediaeval art is charming, but mediaeval emotions are out of date.One can use them in fiction, of course.But then the only things that one can use in fiction are the things that one has ceased to use in fact.Believe me, no civilized man ever regrets a pleasure, and no uncivilized man ever knows what a pleasure is.""I know what pleasure is," cried Dorian Gray."It is to adore some one.""That is certainly better than being adored," he answered, toying with some fruits."Being adored is a nuisance.Women treat us just as humanity treats its gods.They worship us, and are always bothering us to do something for them.""I should have said that whatever they ask for they had first given to us," murmured the lad gravely."They create love in our natures.

They have a right to demand it back."

"That is quite true, Dorian," cried Hallward.

"Nothing is ever quite true," said Lord Henry.

"This is," interrupted Dorian."You must admit, Harry, that women give to men the very gold of their lives.""Possibly," he sighed, "but they invariably want it back in such very small change.That is the worry.Women, as some witty Frenchman once put it, inspire us with the desire to do masterpieces and always prevent us from carrying them out.""Harry, you are dreadful! I don't know why I like you so much.""You will always like me, Dorian," he replied."Will you have some coffee, you fellows? Waiter, bring coffee, and fine-champagne, and some cigarettes.No, don't mind the cigarettes--I have some.Basil, I can't allow you to smoke cigars.You must have a cigarette.A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure.It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied.What more can one want? Yes, Dorian, you will always be fond of me.I represent to you all the sins you have never had the courage to commit.""What nonsense you talk, Harry!" cried the lad, taking a light from a fire-breathing silver dragon that the waiter had placed on the table.

"Let us go down to the theatre.When Sibyl comes on the stage you will have a new ideal of life.She will represent something to you that you have never known.""I have known everything," said Lord Henry, with a tired look in his eyes, "but I am always ready for a new emotion.I am afraid, however, that, for me at any rate, there is no such thing.Still, your wonderful girl may thrill me.I love acting.It is so much more real than life.Let us go.Dorian, you will come with me.I am so sorry, Basil, but there is only room for two in the brougham.You must follow us in a hansom."They got up and put on their coats, sipping their coffee standing.

The painter was silent and preoccupied.There was a gloom over him.He could not bear this marriage, and yet it seemed to him to be better than many other things that might have happened.After a few minutes, they all passed downstairs.He drove off by himself, as had been arranged, and watched the flashing lights of the little brougham in front of him.A strange sense of loss came over him.He felt that Dorian Gray would never again be to him all that he had been in the past.Life had come between them....His eyes darkened, and the crowded flaring streets became blurred to his eyes.

When the cab drew up at the theatre, it seemed to him that he had grown years older.